The Tequila Brand You Are, Based On Your Zodiac Sign

Something about tequila brings people together, as if the word itself ensures the type of day or night you and your friends have ahead. The familiar burning sensation of it running down your throat, the ritual of licking the salt and sucking the fresh lime, you're all in it together. That is if you can agree on what kind to drink.

From the new-age celebrity tequila brands to the top-shelf names we're all familiar with, there's a lot of different tequilas out there. Whether you're at the liquor store or behind the bar, it can be difficult to choose — especially if you're just a social drinker. Tequila tasting is quite a skill, after all, and it takes a trained palette to recognize the nuances of flavors from one brand to another. Fortunately, you don't have to taste them all for yourself.

We're not all sommeliers, and sometimes we're just drinking to drink. But, if you're someone who wants to enjoy their tequila cocktail rather than suffer through it, it really comes down to the brand you choose. So, why not start with the brand of tequila you'd be, based on your zodiac sign? You can use it in a frozen margarita recipe or sip it on the rocks — everyone has to start somewhere. Only this way the stars decide.

Aries are upbeat, positive, and playful people — you just don't want to compete with them. Apparently, being the first sign of the zodiacs isn't enough for an Aries. They need to be first in every other aspect of their lives, too. Just like the rams that represent them, when an Aries sets their mind on something, they go all in — head first, and often without thinking it through. Unsurprisingly, that way of going about things often leads to some hard learned lessons. But, as long as they win, it will be well worth it in the end.

Having said all of that, it's obvious that if the Aries were any tequila brand they'd be the one that's considered the undisputed category leader: Jose Cuervo. The tequila brand sold more than 9 million cases in 2022 alone — making it the highest selling tequila by a landslide. But, that doesn't necessarily reflect its quality. In Tasting Table's ranking of popular tequila brands, Jose Cuervo came in last place. That only goes to show that, coming in first doesn't always mean you're the best.

Another thing that our taste testers so fittingly pointed out was, not only is Jose Cuervo the number one tequila in the world — it will also give you the number one hangover. So, while the Aries may be winning in one measure of the word, they're definitely paying a price. But, knowing them, it's worth it.

There are a lot of things you could say about Tauruses. They're dependable, level-headed, hard working, and focused — but most people would call them stubborn. There's nothing that they value more than consistency. Much of their association with being stubborn comes from their reluctance to venture outside of the stability of their routines. Any free time they do give themselves is usually spent relaxing. For that reason, if the Taurus were any tequila brand, they'd have to be one that they could find anywhere, even Costco.

If you hadn't guessed it already, the tequila brand that the Taurus would be is none other than Kirkland Signature — Costco's very own private label. Although a distillery outside of Guadalajara is who really makes the Costco tequila. Sold in three varieties: Silver, añejo, and reposado, Kirkland Signature tequila is sold exclusively at the wholesale store and can be easily purchased during the Taurus's planned grocery trips. It might not be the best tequila you ever tasted — the reposado and gold are significantly more tolerable than the silver — but it'll be there if you need it.

Geminis are probably one of, if not THE, most famous zodiac signs — but not necessarily in a good way. Whether you're an astrology believer or not, you've likely heard of these signs and their unfortunate reputation for being two-faced. Much of that characterization can be traced to the fact that Gemini are represented by twins, which is often symbolized by an image of two masks. Whether the two-faced descriptor is true is up for debate, but with names like Kanye West and Donald Trump among the list of famous Gemini, there's no denying how controversial the sign can get. Fittingly, the tequila brand they would be is just the same.

No tequila brand is quite as controversial as 818, founded by Kendall Jenner in 2020. Being a new business endeavor for the reality TV star turned supermodel, 818 tequila definitely garnered a good amount of attention upon its release — and not the best ways. Much of the negative reactions centered around Jenner having no ties to Mexico. The brand has, in turn, been accused of cultural appropriation. Still, if you believe that no publicity is bad publicity, then 818 has gotten plenty of it. Of course, collaborations with brands like Rao's for boozy pasta and trendy glittery espresso martini bombs help, too. 

Despite all the drama, 818 has stood out as a successful tequila brand, garnering 22 tasting awards including Gold Medal and Best Reposado at the World Tequila Awards.

Like the crabs that represent them, Cancers can be difficult people to get to know. But, once you break through their cold, hard shells, you'll be happy to find that these signs are far from the distant, stony-hearted people they come off as. Underneath, Cancers are actually incredibly intuitive, emotional, and empathic people. These signs have a way of understanding exactly how you feel without having to explain, and a maternal nature that puts you instantly at ease. It's instantly clear that their walls were only up for their own protection.

Given the Cancer's emotional side, they're also incredibly attached to history and tradition — with a special nostalgia for familial ancestry. The tequila brand that the Cancer would be has a little known family history of its own: Lalo. Featured in Tasting Table's round up of 23 top rated tequilas to try in 2024, the Lalo tequila brand is the product of Eduardo González Jr., the grandson of Don Julio González, who, as you might know, is the creator of one of the biggest tequila brands in the world. But, what makes this tequila brand so special is its use of the traditional and the contemporary.

One of Lalo's trademarks is its use of champaign yeasts to make the spirit, giving Lalo tequila its staple fruity flavor profile and balanced flavor. It's not traditional, but it's one of the reasons why Lalo has become a popular sipping tequila.

Born from July to August, Leos are the summertime babies of the zodiac — and they have the personalities to match. These signs love the spotlight, and they're natural entertainers. While they can come off as braggy, and have definitely been guilty of assuming the world revolves around them (they are ruled by the Sun, after all) Leos have a passion for life that makes them infectious to be around. These lions live every day to the fullest, and they're happy to celebrate no matter the occasion. The tequila brand they'd be could help with that.

Deep down, every Leo thinks they're a celebrity. So, it's only right that if these signs were any tequila brand, they'd be one of the many celebrity-endorsed tequilas on the market. However, fitting into their sunny nature, they'd be a very specific one known as Casa Del Sol. Made in partnership with actress Eva Longoria, Alejandra Pelayo, and Mariana Padilla — who have family histories deeply rooted in the industry — Casa Del Sol is one of the few women-owned tequila brands on the market. It also helps that "sol" is sun in Spanish for that final Leo touch.

Virgos are the most productive of the zodiac signs, which is surprising, considering they're also known for being perfectionists. Clearly, these signs are the ones to ask if you need something done. Not only will they get the job done in time, but they'll do it without a flaw. They often enjoy doing things just for the satisfaction of crossing something off of their to-do lists, and they enjoy anything that they can break down, step by step. For that reason, the Virgo is a tequila brand that proclaims not to have invented tequila — but to have perfected it.

That's right, if the Virgo were any tequila on the market, they'd be Patrón. This brand of tequila is often included in debates over which is considered the best — and for good reason. Patrón makes its tequila in small batches, with an emphasis on quality and not quantity. That's certainly something that falls in line with the Virgo's way of thinking. Patrón is also one of the more costly tequilas on the market, but you get what you pay for. Sweet and citrusy with a peppery finish, Patrón is one of the best-tasting tequilas you can get — no matter if it's the silver or the ultra-premium bottle.

There's a reason why the Libra is the only zodiac sign represented by an inanimate object: the scale. It's because they're obsessed with balance. Known as the aesthetes of the zodiac, this mainly manifests in the physical form — giving these signs a keen eye for symmetry that makes them talented decorators, stylists, and art curators. But, it's also deeper than that. These signs crave balance in their relationships, too. The Libra doesn't just crave companionship, they thrive in it. Still, they'd probably prefer it if said companion was easy on the eyes.

None of this is to say Libras are shallow, by any means. But, it is to say that the tequila brand they'd be has to have some bottle appeal — which makes this sign's tequila any easy one. If the Libra were any tequila brand, they'd be Clase Azul. This tequila looks as good as it tastes, and it has a price sticker to match. Even if you're not a tequila drinker, the iconic white and blue, traditionally painted bottles are easily recognizable. Plus, the eight month aging process that goes into each bottle makes the tequila inside impeccably balanced. That's something the Libra should appreciate.

Scorpios are yet another sign with a not so great reputation. Much of that can boil down to the fact that, depending on what side of the bed they woke up on, these signs can either be fun and enticing or relentless and controlling. There is no in between. Otherwise, these signs mostly keep to themselves. In fact, very few will ever fully get past the Scorpio's mystique. These signs know how to make it feel like you are, though. They'll let you in on just enough information for you to feel special — but they always have a secret they're keeping.

Scorpios do have some unorthodox tastes. If it's dark, scary, or generally kept within the underbelly of society, it'll pique these thrill-seeker's interest. Which is why if Scorpios were any tequila brand, they'd be the little one known as Loco. Coming in at number 11 in Tasting Table's ranking of tequila brands, the surprisingly smooth Loco Tequila goes to show that nothing is as bad or scary as it seems — Scorpios included.

Sagittariuses are often called the adventurers of the zodiac. Represented by the archer, these signs are on a constant quest for knowledge — and they're not afraid to take the road less traveled to get it. Driven by an unwavering positivity and lust for life, the Sagittarius finds the best in any situation. Good or bad, these signs learn from every experience. Their habitual optimism can be infectious, making them nearly impossible to stay angry with. But, like all the zodiac signs, these signs have their faults. In the Sagittarius's case, it's their brutal honesty and bluntness.

There are worse qualities than being too honest, but these signs could learn from thinking before they speak. In most cases, it's not what they say, just how they say it. However, the Sagittarius's fun and playful manner means you'll end up cracking a smile no matter how hard you try not to. In so, this sign's tequila brand is one that pays homage to their truth telling nature — and that's none other than Cierto. Translated to the Spanish word for "true," Cierto tequila showcases the natural terroir of Jalisco — without any additives or artificial ingredients. It's true to its nature, just like the Sagittarius.

If Capricorns are known for anything, it's their work ethic. Represented by a magical creature called the sea goat and associated with the knees, it's obvious that these signs were born to climb. In turn, Capricorns are incredibly resilient, goal oriented, and responsible people — it's no wonder why people call them "workaholics." These signs always have a goal in mind, and they work hard to achieve it. The only problem is they hardly ever give themselves the opportunity to slow down and enjoy the fruits of their labor. That's why, if they were any tequila brand, they'd be one that's made for sipping.

While more commonly enjoyed as a quick, down-and-back shot or in a margarita, there are people who prefer to sip their tequila. Of course, it can't just be any tequila — it'd have to be Casa Dragones tequila, the self proclaimed number one tequila for sipping. Crafted to showcase the purity of the agave itself, Casa Dragones tequila delivers a crisp, smooth flavor without the burn you might associate other tequilas with. It's the perfect tequila for Capricorns to sit, sip, and kick their feet up with — even if it's just for a minute or two.

Aquariuses always make it a point to be different. It's in their nature. In fact, despite the "aqua" in their names, these signs are actually air signs — which only goes to show how far these signs will go to evade predictability. Whether it's by their opinions, senses of fashion, or wacky haircuts, Aquariuses always stand apart from the crowd, so it's only right that their tequila brand they be do the same, which brings us to Almave.

Endorsed by the Formula 1 driver, Lewis Hamilton, it'd be easy to write off Almave as just another celebrity tequila brand — but it's far, far from that. Almave is unlike any other tequila, celebrity associated or not, thanks to its zero ABV content. That's right, Almave is the first, and possibly the only, brand crafting non-alcoholic, blue agave-based spirits the same way it'd be done with alcohol. Amalve is breaking boundaries and defying norms — just like Aquariuses do everyday.

Enjoyed as an alternative in your margaritas, palomas, and other tequila-centric beverages, Almave brings you all your favorite tequila based drinks — without any of the alcohol. Just don't call it a mocktail.

Pisces can be difficult to differentiate from other zodiac signs, but that's only because they tend to adopt the personalities of whoever they're around. Most of what makes these signs unique lies underneath the surface — in the ways they think, feel, and see the world both around and within them. Represented by two fish swimming in opposite directions, the Pisces's attention is often split between fantasy and reality. These signs have entire worlds inside of their heads. In turn, Costa, their corresponding tequila brand takes a similar approach — mixing agave sourced from the highlands with those from the lowlands to craft something truly otherworldly.

Like other agave spirits, most tequilas stick to exclusively using agave plants from one of two regions, not both. But Costa is known for creating the first "hi/lo" tequila — meaning they use agave from both Los Altos (the highlands) and Jalisco (the Lowlands). The result is a tequila unlike any other, one that blends the sweet flavors of the highlands with the peppery flavors of the lowlands. Demonstrated across each of the brand's tequilas — from the blanco to the anejo and reposado — Costa offers a tequila that's completely different from anything else you'll find on the market, even if it might not look like it. Just like the Pisces, you don't know what complexity is waiting inside a Costa's tequilas bottle until you dive in.