15 Canned Cocktails At Trader Joe's, Ranked Worst To Best

There are definitely some cocktails you should know how to make at home, but playing bartender can be tricky. Most of us don't have a completely decked-out home bar with all the various liqueurs we may need to make a specific drink, and the skills to actually create those drinks is another challenge entirely. If you don't want to whip up a cocktail from scratch, you may assume that your only alcoholic drink options are wine and beer. However, there are now more store-bought canned cocktails than ever to try, and you'll find a ton of different options at Trader Joe's.

I decided to taste through 15 of the canned cocktails I found at my local Trader Joe's, and in the process, I discovered that there are a lot of delicious (and a lot of subpar) canned cocktails out there. I ranked the varieties I tried according to flavor balance, first and foremost, with less sweet and more acidic cocktails ranking near the top of the list. Although we might have different tastes when it comes to canned cocktails, hopefully, this review can give you a better idea of which brands you may want to try the next time you're picking up drinks from your local Trader Joe's. And no worries — no bartending skills are required.

15. Links Drinks Classic Transfusion

Grape soda lovers, this one is for you. It's Links Drinks Classic Transfusion, and the variety I tried is made with vodka, ginger ale, and grape juice. The result is a canned cocktail with a flavor profile that's somewhat similar to grape soda — if grape soda were usually spiked with vodka, that is. And sure, that may sound tasty, but if you're the kind of person who ever used grape soda as a chaser for cheap vodka during your college years, then this stuff is likely to bring back some foul memories like it did for me.

Even if you've never had a bad experience with vodka and grape soda, though, this cocktail is way, way too sweet. There's the sugar from the ginger ale, of course, but adding even more sugar in the form of grape juice makes for a cloyingly sweet flavor profile. Having more than half a can of this stuff is enough to give me a full-on sugar hangover, which is why I won't be trying this brand anymore. That being said, if you can handle intense sweetness more than I can, this may just be the canned cocktail for you.

14. JuneShine Island Cooler Hard Kombucha

I love kombucha, with its fruitiness and its funkiness joining forces to create a sort of soda that I actually feel good sipping. However, it's not really what I want to taste when I'm craving a canned cocktail. That's partially why JuneShine's Island Cooler Hard Kombucha ranks near the bottom of this list. I don't really know who would ever ask for a spiked kombucha, but, alas, this product exists, offering a drink alternative that never really needed to be brought into the world.

The real problem with this particular beverage is that the kombucha doesn't really seem to have much flavor at all. This variety was vaguely tropical, with notes of kiwi and perhaps coconut. However, those notes are quite muted. Admittedly, so is the flavor of the alcohol, but that leaves you with a beverage that doesn't taste like much at all. There's a bit of sweetness there, but the bold acidity balances it out nicely, which is why it's not ranked in the lowest spot on this list, but it's still not a drink I would personally ever want to buy again.

13. Mixed-Up Pineapple Daiquiri Cocktail

There aren't always a ton of rum cocktails in the canned cocktail section of your local liquor store, so it's nice that Trader Joe's gives us an option to explore a wider range of beverages than we might find at other establishments. And if you tend to like sweet, rum-forward drinks, then this one is going to be right up your alley. Mixed-Up's Pineapple Daiquiri Cocktail is ultra sweet, thanks to the inclusion of pineapple juice and agave nectar in the recipe. That pineapple flavor is quite pronounced and easily overshadows the hint of lime that appears in the recipe as well.

Personally, I find this cocktail to be a bit too saccharine, with a tropical note that's absolutely too pronounced and far too little acid to offer a well-balanced cocktail. That being said, I'm not much of a daiquiri person anyway, so I'm definitely biased here. If you're looking for an even, not-too-sweet canned cocktail from Trader Joe's, though, there are definitely better options to explore.

12. Sunboy Pineapple Spiked Coconut Water

Here is another product that doesn't really need to exist: spiked coconut water. Sunboy's spiked coconut water is another head-scratcher for me, since coconut water is the kind of beverage I turn to when I'm craving something light, refreshing, and hydrating — not when I'm trying to enjoy a cocktail. Once I opened the can and tried a few sips for myself, I still didn't really get the appeal. Sure, this stuff tastes a bit like coconut water, but since the pineapple flavor is so pronounced, you don't really get that strong of a coconut note at all. Instead, it just tastes like any other pineapple-flavored beverage.

I found this canned cocktail to be a bit sweet, but it's not so overpoweringly sugary that it'll leave you feeling terrible the next day. However, I still wouldn't call this beverage balanced, since essentially all you're tasting is that pop of pineapple. Unless you're looking for spiked coconut water specifically, there are other, better cocktails to try at the popular grocery chain.

11. Good Boy Vodka Blackberry Iced Tea and Lemonade

Iced tea and lemonade really is a match made in heaven. You have the sweetness and tartness from the lemonade, while the iced tea offers just a hint of bitterness that really balances things out. That's why I was so excited to try Good Boy's Vodka Blackberry Iced Tea and Lemonade. Although it wasn't objectively bad, it was certainly a bit of a disappointment; this stuff doesn't really taste like a classic Arnold Palmer at all.

Instead, that blackberry flavor is what I really picked up on as soon as I took a sip. There was a hint of acidity there from the lemonade, but I didn't really notice any of the bitterness I was looking forward to — and that tastes particularly good in a balanced cocktail. This stuff isn't terrible if you're looking for something easy and fresh to drink, but if you're comparing it to an actual cocktail made by a bartender at a real bar, it's not ideal.

10. Fabrizia Limoncello Spritz

If you want a refreshing summer cocktail to enjoy on a hot day, Fabrizia's Limoncello Spritz might pique your interest. It contains only three ingredients: Limoncello, of course, along with sparkling wine and sparkling water. The result is a bubbly, citrusy drink that's best enjoyed outdoors with the sun shining and your phone on do not disturb.

I love the idea of a canned limoncello spritz, but this was far from my favorite drink in the lineup. The flavor was a bit too intense, almost reminding me of citrus-scented cleaner instead of a light, refreshing beverage. I would've liked it to taste a bit more like wine with just a hint of limoncello, but that bold liqueur note really overpowered the whole drink. It's definitely not terrible, but you could easily thin it out with some additional sparkling wine for a lighter, more approachable cocktail.

9. Nantucket Red Vodka Cranberry

Let's be honest: While there are ingredients you can use to elevate vodka cranberry, it is one of the easiest drinks you could ever make at home — even if your bartending skills are extremely limited. Therefore, I'm not too dazzled by the prospect of a canned version of this super straightforward drink. On the other hand, I recognize that cranberry juice and vodka do, in fact, taste great together, and I appreciate that this canned beverage is a good option for convenience-minded shoppers.

Considering this is such a simple combo, Nantucket Red tasted much like I expected it to. The cranberry juice itself is the most prominent ingredient, with a mixture of sweetness and bitterness that perhaps leans toward the more sugary end of the spectrum. The flavor of the vodka really isn't that strong, making this an ideal canned beverage option for those who don't love how alcohol tastes. However, it's still a bit sweet for my taste. That can be easily fixed with a lime wedge, although I'll probably just make my own homemade vodka crans in the future instead of opting for the canned variety.

8. Talkhouse Encore Iced Tea and Lemonade Vodka Soda

Here's another iced tea and lemonade combo, but this is one that actually offers that refreshing flavor I look for when blending these two beverages. It's Talkhouse Encore's Iced Tea and Lemonade Vodka Soda, and it offers a simple cocktail that's especially easy to sip. Perhaps the most prominent note in this beverage is the lemon, which comes through with more acidity than it does sweetness. You can actually taste the bitterness of the black tea, though, which makes this a more balanced drink than some. Another plus? This brand uses real premium vodka.

Talkhouse is known for its more seltzer-like beverages, which may be why the flavor of this particular variety isn't so strong. While it is a bit lighter than I would have expected from an iced tea and lemonade, that's not necessarily a bad thing, especially when you're looking for a drink that's especially easy to sip. It's far from my favorite of the bunch, but it still may be worth a try if you enjoy an invigorated iced cocktail like a spiked Arnold Palmer.

7. Owl's Brew Lime and Lemon Verbena Rum Mojito

Out of the two rum-based canned cocktails I tried from Trader Joe's, Owl's Brew Lime and Lemon Verbena Rum Mojito happened to be my favorite. This is somewhat of an unusual cocktail, but it's one that's tasty nonetheless. This isn't your standard mojito — that note of lemon verbena is strong, providing the drink with a nice herbal, slightly floral twist. At the same time, the addition of lime keeps things tasting nice and refreshing, despite the sweetness that's often present in a mojito (and is here as well, although not overwhelmingly so). There's a nice balance here that keeps this drink tasting super refreshing.

Personally, rum isn't my liquor of choice, and the bold, intense flavor of a mojito doesn't always hit the spot for me, which is why this drink doesn't rank as highly as some of the others on this list. However, if you're on the hunt for a rum cocktail, Owl's Brew may just be right up your alley.

6. Sun Cruiser Classic Iced Tea

Grab a random canned cocktail off of a store shelf, and chances are, it's going to be carbonated. If you like bubbly drinks, that's great, but if you prefer to avoid carbonation, then it might be kind of a letdown. However, there are more non-carbonated RTD drinks coming onto the scene these days, and Sun Cruiser Classic Iced Tea is one of them. This may not be the most nuanced or interesting canned cocktail in this lineup, but its simplicity is exactly what I like about it. It's simply iced tea and vodka, and it's a light combo that's easy to drink and delicious when served chilled. And since a lot of us aren't going to take the time to brew the tea from scratch and chill it before mixing it with vodka, this is a drink that actually does make sense in a can.

If you like your drinks sugary and sweet, you may not like this one — it's not really sweet at all, and despite the tea's smoothness, it does have a bitter edge to it that not everyone may like. However, when you're just craving a cold, refreshing beverage that you can sip on casually without worrying about the sugar hangover the next time, Sun Cruiser's Classic Iced Tea has you covered.

5. Yuzy Pink Guava Margarita

Do you ever find yourself craving a margarita but just can't be bothered to get all of the necessary ingredients and shake one up yourself? Then Yuzy's Pink Guava Margarita, which was one of my favorites in this lineup, might be just the premade alcoholic beverage you're looking for. For an RTD cocktail, it's incredibly well balanced, and if you shake it with ice before you serve it, it almost tastes like a margarita you might enjoy at your favorite Mexican restaurant.

Yes, this margarita is somewhat sugary, but it's also evened out by a nice acidity that keeps things tasting fresh. The addition of guava juice makes for an especially refreshing, fruity flavor profile that leans tropical without those overpowering pineapple or coconut notes. Just be sure that you serve this stuff cold — like really, really cold — if you want it to taste as good as it can. Once it gets a little too warm, it takes on a sweeter, more syrupy quality that keeps it from ranking higher on this list.

4. Boardwalk Pink Lemonade

Pink lemonade is a beloved summertime drink, so it only makes sense that spiking it would make for a tasty canned beverage. That's just what you'll get when you try out Boardwalk Pink Lemonade, which tastes just as simple as it sounds. This is just alcoholic pink lemonade, with a balanced sweetness and bold acidity that makes every sip more refreshing than the last. Yes, there is a somewhat bitter aftertaste from the inclusion of alcohol, but it actually helps create a nice bitter edge that balances the drink out even more.

Ultimately, this is a somewhat sweet beverage that probably isn't going to make you feel too great in larger quantities — anyone who's knocked back enough hard lemonade in one sitting can attest to the unpleasant effects of so much sugar. But when you just want to sip on a glass of lemonade that offers a little extra buzz and bitterness, this is a canned cocktail that's worth checking out this summer

3. Everything but the Bartender Cosmopolitan

The Cosmopolitan is an absolute classic, with its iconic pink hue and its surprisingly bitter finish despite that bold color. But it may not be the kind of drink that you want to shake up every day — particularly when you want a drink you can sip on the go. That's where Trader Joe's Everything but the Bartender Cosmopolitan comes into play. This canned cocktail tastes surprisingly close to the real thing, and it's one that I'm definitely going to keep stocked in my fridge for those evenings when I'm craving a lazy cocktail.

Admittedly, this cocktail is a bit sweeter than I would prefer my Cosmo to be, but it's nothing that a squeeze of lime juice can't fix. And when you shake the beverage with some ice along with a bit of muddled lime, you have a Cosmo that could go toe-to-toe with you might get at your neighborhood water hole. Make sure you serve it in a cute coupe glass, and you've just saved yourself an expensive bar tab.

2. Two Chicks Sparkling Keylime Lemonade

If Two Chicks' Sparkling Keylime Lemonade proves one thing, it's that a simple drink doesn't mean it has to be boring. It isn't a super complicated, complex canned drink — and that's exactly how it should be. After all, when you choose a canned beverage, it's probably just because you want to drink something easy, refreshing, and approachable, all descriptors that are appropriate for this Two Chicks beverage. Ultimately, it just tastes like an amped up vodka soda, with some extra acidity to keep things tasting tart. It really tastes more like seltzer than it does actual lemonade, though, since there's not a lot of sweetness to contend with here.

Two Chicks offers an incredibly balanced drink that feels like a step up in quality from other basic seltzers you may have tried in the past. Plus, I love the fact that the company uses real vodka for this product, which offers a slight note of bitterness without any of the funk of cheaper malt liquor.

1. The Finnish Long Drink Traditional Citrus

The best Trader Joe's canned cocktail of them all? The Finnish Long Drink Traditional Citrus. This is a wildly refreshing beverage, and it can easily replace any other canned cocktail in your fridge. The citrus soda the drink is based on has a lovely bitter edge to it, with a grapefruit note that creates a more complex flavor profile than lemon or lime ever could on their own. Yes, there's a hint of sweetness here, but it's incredibly subtle. In fact, if you're specifically looking for a sweet drink, you're not likely to enjoy this one. On the other hand, those who prefer a more bitter, more balanced, and more interesting cocktail are likely to gravitate toward this product.

You actually don't taste a lot of the liquor here, apart from the slight bitterness it contributes to the drink. Since the focus is on that bold, grapefruit-flavored soda, this is a drink that goes down especially easy. And compared to the rest of the canned cocktails on this list, it's the one that tastes the best straight out of the can, no glassware needed.

Methodology

I selected these canned cocktails based on availability at my local Trader Joe's. I tried all of them chilled at the same time, and I ranked them according to flavor balance. Drinks that were more sweet than not tended to rank lower on the list, while more bitter and acidic drinks with just the right balance of sweetness ranked higher.

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